What was wrong?

When being prompted to make decisions that could permanently alter the course of our life, we all want to make sure that the choice we're about to do is making the most of every kind of effort we're putting in , we start foresseing risks we may probably encounter and identifiying ways of getting ourselves out. Definetly, we all try in some way to make our actions justified and our steps measured BUT following what?: A logical intuiton?!

I'll call it so, when logic can still turn out to be misleading and when intuition cannot be fully trusted. Here, a right intermediary dosage between logic and intuition is to be found!

I don't know if i have ever found this middle point I always do settle for myself, and even if I did, nothing was ever there to assure me that it has worked effectively.The only thing I do know for sure is that there are many things I wish I could just go back on and find what was wrong or just didn't work about them so that I'd avoid it on later times: Was is it my intuition that overtook logic in actions ,was I just too hard on myself that my own instinct eventually took revenge on me, or are there other things that got involved that I can never get to know?

But when everything seems to go well and that it suddenly all turn out to be an illusion, there is nothing more dreadful than ignoring what is this precise thing that brought it all down.

Writing impulse!

I wish I could update my blog more oftenly that I've been doing it so far.
In fact, It occurs to me as i'm going through some of my everyday activities, to get some -on spur of the moment -ideas quite surprisingly so much that most most of what seems commonplace for me as being dealt with on a daily base, takes new meanings for me and becomes some unexpectable source of inspiration.
I have to admit that it is my tendency to feel things intensively that bring about such attiude and i don't know whether i should feel blessed or misfortunate for this, for extreme sensibility automatically brings on its way more vulnerability and i've grown quite sure of this recently.
Anyhow, i think that whatever may be my reasons for writing they can't be but an effective way to pour out my soul, whether they were brought about by positive or negative impulses.

Why am I here?!

Today, I came across an article dealing with questions such as the meaning of existence, the purpose of life and others all ranking at a first sight under this category of endless existencial philosophical questions, namely the one that most caught my attention and got me mulling over it long: "Why am I here"?
In an attempt to find an answer for it, the one most of us would take for granted and that immediately came to my mind is the religious interpretation. It is a -ready to be taken-answer, I do personnaly adhere to as an everlasting truth. Contrarily to some misconceptions; this one doesn't prevent us from finding everyday other reasons for our life lying in every simple aspect of it. Everyday we can add some new meaning to it, by taking actions that would let us feel irrepleacble where we've been placed. Everyone of us wants to have a life he's wished and made for himself, and this wouldn't be possible unless he makes some difference in other people's life.

I don't feel like being 20 today!

Today was my birthday, this may sound gramatically incorrect but it is just how it all seems to be for me. An overwhelming feeling of being so far behind events, of not belonging to any period of time fills me at this very moment of the day. Maybe this is how it feels to grow one year older without having really grown at many considerations!. What I mean by considerations is not necessarily related to maturity or wisdom, I'm quite aware of the category of age I'm about to enter. But it is mostly the feeling of not having made things different from what they used to be one year before now, of not having attained this slight difference I wished could just occur in my life.
Change may be subtle, even unnoticeable sometimes but it feels to be lacking wherever it was meant to happen. I don't know what is this change I would have wanted for myself, I'm far from reaching everything I have aspired for, but I do at the same time ignore what precise change do I need to feel in priority.
Sometimes I come even to ask myself whether I have put too much goals into perspective that I'm finally reaching none of them. Where does this interference in aims just come from? Is it my will to have everything in hand without knowing what everything is truly about. Do I really have what this change takes? I've been asking myself these questions at different stages of my existence, but today i feel they are asserting themselves more than ever. Maybe the real change doesn't even need to happen to me but to the people I'm dealing with on a daily base, since the change that truly breeds good things into one's life and help us fulfill inner and outer containement, is the one that gradually finds its way to us
From all this things, one thing is fore sure: I don't feel like being 20 today!

An idea brought to life...

The first thing i feel like starting with is saying welcome to anyone who may visit my blog.
What i would like to say is that i've been quite hesitating about the idea but finally... the blog is here!
I hope you'll enjoy your visits, and that the posts to come will be always carrying something worth being shared with you.

Deep meaning lyric's

"Why pain is the only way to hapiness?"
"If you want to live let live"
"When harm is done no love can be won"
" I guess i found i have to change the world, to make you see me"
"I have always kept my faith in love"
"Open up your eyes, don't let it go"
"Why do all good things come to an end?"
"Sometimes we need to be cruel to be kind"

On ne sait pas pourquoi?!

Parfois on se sent tellement malheureux,...on a l'impression que tout se tourne contre nous...On a peur de se confier à quiconque de peur de déceler en nous quelque autre malheur. On se contente donc de souffrir en silence de celui présent.
On refuse toute consolation, on conçoit bien avant quelque redoutable réaction.
C'est ainsi qu'on sent en nous un sentiment étrange, puisant on ne sait où. Comment peut on donc en faire part à quelqu'un d'autre quand on n'en connaît rien nous-mêmes?
Accumulation de frustrations...sentiment brusque...peur subite? Quelle qu'en soit la raison l'affronter ne dépend pas de nous.
Mais ce qui me parait le plus difficile à comprendre, c'est que ça naît de rien, et que ca prend de telles proportions qu'on a l'impression que c'est tout le malheur du monde qu'on porte sur le dos!

Se regarder en face

Dans nos moments de défaite, lorsqu'on se sent incapable d'agir devant une situation, lorsque les choses prennent un cours immuable et que notre mal de vivre devient plus implacable que jamais (parce qu'il y a toujours un mal de vivre), dans ces situations d"infirmité'" qui ont dû accabler chacun de nous à un moment ou un autre de sa vie, on sent que le mal est bien installé, qu'il s'affirme et se manifeste plus que jamais. Il se peut qu'on aie senti qu'il nous guettait plus d'une fois, mais étions-nous assez clairvoyants pour en juger l'ampleur et l'imminence?
Parce que n'est qu'une fois qu'un désagrément survient qu'on commence à passer en revue nos agissements et comportements de tous les jours et qu'on en remet en question plus d'un.
Ce noir intangible qui nous bandait l'âme et la conscience se dissipe, et ce n'est que là qu'on voit les choses clairement en face.
Qu'est ce qui nous empêchait de faire le "tri" avant? Qu'est ce qui nous faisait croire que nos décisions sont les plus sages et nos comportement les plus sensés...du moins dans les mesures où il nous a été possible d'agir.
Notre incapacité à se juger nous-même, cette touche d'indubitablité qui accompagnait chacun de nos actes avait eu et a toujours tendance à nous faire croire qu'on ne peut être plus parfait que l'on l'a été nous empêchant ainsi de nous regarder en face.

When we don't have what we like,should we really like what we have?!

Should we really do so? By behaving so, are we going to enjoy life more?! Since we do no longer believe in attaining something, when it seems to be so out of reach, we ultimately have to convince ourselves by the necessity of doing with what we have,of course....by fear of being frustrated!
But this will certainly imply some concessions to do,this, if it certainly doesn't mean that the fight is over!