Expected...easy to swallow!

Finding out about a truth, as benign as this truth might be, is something that will certainly alter our being and the way we're perceiving things in. But being faced with a reality that was somehow expected, has really little to do with a real finding at least, it shouldn't affect us the way un unexpected one may do, that's because the accomplished fact could more than once had been considered as a part of a process i'd call "truth simulation". Thus, the odds of us getting through turmoil when knowing about it, are no longer the same.
And just as many of you can possibly think: As long as something hasn't really been taking place, we can by no means assume it to be a truth or to put it in proverbial words: "What the eyes don't see, the heart doesn't grieve over".
However, a new variable getting involved in our assumption of things will doubtlessly cause some some serious deep changes to occur. What makes the whole difference here as to what this change will cost us is one's personal willingness to assume it as a truth!

Moderating hopes

People generally tend to expect help from others more than they can provide themselves with.

When we aim at attaining something, and that other people can make us get what we want, we quite inconsciously hang a big part of our hope on them, so much that we tend to say that we've been desillusioned or let down by people we were expecting a lot from when one of them doesn't provide the help needed.

So many times we blame others for being behind not our getting what we want or for not having helped it. But the real blame should be put on ourselves, on our uncapacity to accept failures or refusals. What does it mean to be denied something by someone, (that's in case we assume it to be a right). Or what does it make to find out about someone's other side only because that person didn't meet our expectations somewhere along the road?

I don't know how this is being happening to me, but I'm feeling something of it right now. Maybe I should make myself stronger in some way, in more accepting reactions and responses, in building hopes only on what is not likely to let me down someday, and especially confiding in myself a little more before trusting anyone else.

Not this time!

So here I am...stuck at home again, trying to make make myself ready for a whole week exams I'm actually far from being able to get ready for...
I don't know how many weekends I've consecutively been spending here at home, but I guess it's been quite a long time since I've last went out doing some saturday shopping or been to my grandma's home for which I feel an outburst of deep yearning like never before ! It's not that I've always had something precise to do on these days, but on times, I just didn't feel like going anywhere, it's a kind of inner emptiness that no human contact seem to be able to fill.
But now that I need to gather all my forces and will to work, I feel I'm eager to some people company so much that I can't get to focus on anything that I'm doing. I perfectly know that it's not an appropriate time for holding such a feeling, but I just can't help it!